Quotes of the Day

At my age the only problem is with remembering names. When I call everyone darling, it has damn all to do with passionately adoring them, but I know I'm safe calling them that. Although, of course, I adore them too.
Richard Attenborough

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
Joe E Lewis.

Mt List

My list of things to do right now is rather daunting. It isn't so much that the list is long, it is more that the items on the list are going to each take a lot of time and effort. Of course time is in short supply and effort is well quite frankly being exhausted. I wish I had a small slave/child I could boss around.

"You there, spawn, pack my bags, organize Valerie's finances, and give me no sass!!"

If I'm being perfectly honest, I think this kind of illustrates the major problem in my relationship. I can not rely on him for anything. I ask him to call a plumber, he keeps putting it off. I ask him to get rent money to me before the 25th, etc, etc, etc.

Dear Santa,
For my next relationship I would like a partner who is responsible.
The end
Gnome

Quotes of the Day

A witty saying proves nothing.
- Voltaire

Sex. Most of you know what that word means, and for those of you that don't, it means "bonin'", and with bonin' comes great responsibility.
Sacha Baron Cohn

Sex can lead to nasty things like herpes, gonorrhea, and something called relationships.
Sacha Baron Cohen

Quote of the Day

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.

Miss Piggy

Leaning on Who?

So yesterday I got an email from my Mother. Said email is a forward from the managers of her property in Cumberland, as it turns out the house needs a new wood stove (fine), has cracks in the walls (uh oh), and has developed a lean to one side (wtf?). I want her to sell, sell like the wind! She says it is ordinary for homes of that age to settle into the ground a little. I say thats fine and dandy but if anything else happens she isn't going to be able to afford to pay to fix it. There are a lot of things I'm not good at, managing money is one of them, but I do think that her best option here is to sell the place. She has credit card debt and there is still money owed on this house. She could pay those off, and put some of the money into savings. She is worried about her future and I think that is reasonable. I just hope we make a good decision this time.

Quote of the Day

Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day. But set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.

Terry Pratchett

Quote of the Day

I've never been a millionaire but I just know I'd be darling at it.

Dorothy Parker

Driven

I need to get cracking on this whole learning how to drive thing. I want to get my N before I move to Vancouver, because learning how to drive in that metropolis is not something I really fancy. I have put this off for way to long, so I am setting some goals for myself.

1. Read my guide this weekend
2. Take lesson next weekend
3. Don't die in firey inferno

Escapism is a dirty whore with Syphallis.

I am having trouble focusing. Every time I step away from a book, the internet, or tv, I find myself off in lala land. My Aunt has the same problem when she is depressed, she would imagine better things and there are large parts of her life which she just can't recall. I'm trying really hard to keep grounded but it isn't easy. I also know I need to start weening myself off of the internet, reading, and tv. I'm going to try and limit myself, a escapism diet if you will.

Valentines Day

The idea behind Valentines Day? To spend some time with someone you love, to honor them and to let them know they are special.

I am so sick and tired of hearing people saying it is a "fake holiday" what the hell does that even mean?? Valentines Day is not a holiday! And whats with the whole Valentines Day was invented by Hallmark, it wasn't it has been around for centuries. I get the whole exploitation of valentines Day thing, because really what special day hasn't been exploited? But I am so tired of this ridiculous idea that just because corporations have commercialized valentines Day, people shouldn't celebrate it. There is no reason to go out and buy things for your significant other on Valentine's Day. Just spend some time together, go for a walk, plan a picnic, remember to tell each other loving things. Just because something has been commercialized (Christmas, Halloween, New Years, Easter, and Birthdays)doesn't mean you have to buy into it.

Quote of the day

Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass.
- Mark Twain's Notebook, 1898

I need a wealthy husband

So I am still losing weight, I am at 139 right now from 155. Yay me! I am trying to get more active by taking the dog for walks but he has the mistaken idea that walks are meant to be tug of war sessions and it is difficult to convince him otherwise. It is proving difficult to eat healthy around Allan, he eats like a monster snd stays as skiiny as a pole. I hate Allan and his super duper metabolism. Stupid skinny boyfriend.

School is going ok, I started off ahead of the curve and then somewhere along the way I got behind and now I am trying to catch up.

Things with Allan are awkward, I guess all I can do is hang in here until April.

I did a really great card reading for myself last night. It was a bit of a reality check, it said I needed to stop focusing on the unreal and daydreams. One of the cards talked about having mercy and compassion and knowing when to leave.

I'm looking forward to change, I know it will be sad but it is necessary.

Update

Loads of stuff going on right now.

It looks as thought I am finally losing some weight! My worst was 155 pounds right now I am 144, phew! I want to be about 110.

I still don't have another job which is scarey, there is very little money coming in.

In May it looks as though I will be heading back to Egypt to help Valerie pack up her container, and to work part time at her school.

In August or September I will be moving back to Vancouver.

I am obsessing a little much over a guy from my past.

It looks as though I will be taking a trip to Australia at the end of 2008, early 2009.

Cairo Day 1.5

Mom brought me home the day before yesterday around 1am. It was fun she has a cab driver she has made friends with called Crazy Magdi. He drove us to Mom's new apartment, all of her roomates are under 30, in fact they are all younger than me. Really nice people, and I met a whole bunch of the because she had a massive X-mas dinner with all of her friends from school planned for yesterday evening, it was a bit overwhelming because of my jetlag but it was also nice. I have access to the internet every day here at Mom's apartment so I will be able to upload pictures of my travels. We leave tonight for our cruise from Luxor to Aswan at 4am our time. This morning I was up around 3am wandering around, my inner clock has not adjusted it'self yet to Egyptian time. I had some nice quiet time with Mom this morning. I have been offered a job at the school which would start in January, they need someone to put together a production for the end of year. I am thinking about it, there are al kinds of reasons to say no, but I'm giving it due consideration, I don't want to dismiss the oppurtunity out of hand. I haven't discussed this with Allan yet. The position would last until the summer, and `i would earn $75 American a day and `I wouldn't have to pay for rent or food.

Jet lag

So it has been an interesting few days. We woke up at 3am and drove over the malahat amid snow flurries, at which point one of our wipers stopped working. We made it to the airport with little time to spare. Had a 6 hour stop over in Toronto, bored stupid. Had a horrible seat mate on the flight to London he stole my pillow! Time is going surrprisingly fast at heathrow, there are SO many people here! Am doing a lot of people watching. Lots of flouro orange suitcases this year must be a trend. I am so exhausted I have been making all kinds of silly mistakes. Also I stink, forgot to put deodorant in my onboad baggage.

Vomit II

So I don't post here that often anymore, and I am going to make a concentrated effort to do more posts, especially while I am in Egypt.

Anyway I have an exam in an hour and quite honestly that has turned my tummy into queezy land. This happens to me every term!! Yesterday before my exam I was retching in the toilet at the library,
"Yeah tah for the books, oh scuse me RRRRRRRAAAAAALLLLLLPPPHHH!!"
Thats how you make friends Naomi style.
Seriously there was this stuning girl in the loo, wearing all kinds of expensive clothes, with her hair and make-up all perfect looking all concerned (but not wrinkeling her brow) asking me if I was ok. LOL I was standing over a toilet in my grubby snow boots, in old jeans, my hair in a messy bun with a $6 t-shirt on thinking fuck-off lady.
"Yup, thanks I'm fine."
She was so nice, and I just wanted her to piss-off.
Honestly vomiting is really just a one person activity. It isn't a spectator sport. I am not bulemic or anorexic and I have sort of grown accustomed to puking on exam days, but thats a little hard to explain to the complete stranger who thinks you are crazy. Argh I just want the evil tummy butterflies to go away, Valerie advised me to sit near the garbage pail just in case. Thanks Mom!

I don't know that everyone would agree with this

Finding a balance

Finding it hard to manage my time between work, school, and leisure. I am working all day every day until my exams when I come home I am totally beat, and being sick all the time sure isn't helping. Allan is being very Allanesque-which is causing problems.

Sigh

It has been a shitty month, in face it has been a very shitty four months. I am trying to get excited about going to Egypt, but the truth is I couldn't care less. I know it will just mean more frustrating arguments with Valerie and I just hate that it takes so much out of me. I am so tired, and so sick all of the time. I need to get out of this house but I can't afford to go anywhere. This is definitely a new low point for me.

Get Crazy with the Cheese Whiz

I'm moving to Vancouver in late August or early September. Crazy man! I have so much stuff I have got to sort out. I need to pack everything a lot of stuff needs to go into storage and I have to decide what stays with Allan.

I don't know what to do about the koi, I'm not sure if Allan is going to take care of them. Argh!

I'm trying to get the house clean for Valerie's visit but that is an uphill climb.
busy,busy.busy!

Sigh

Sucks when you do a lot of stuff and don't get thanked for it. Sucks even more when it goes completely unacknowledged.

Zimmers - My generation

I wish I knew how to post this on facebook

Crazy

This makes my brain bleed. It is not that I don't think that there is a place for a creation based museum, it is more or less the way he is going about it. A lot of his exhibits are very questionable.

Resentment

There are a group of people I have worked with a time or two and everytime I try and do something nice for them it comes back to bite me in the ass. Its as if someone doing something nice for them is just expected, there is never a thank-you or even an indication that they realize someone went out of their way to do something for them. Fuck that.

Vegas?

Susan and I are dorks, which is why I think we would have so much fun here. We could stay at this hotel for Amber's entertainment. Why Amber? check this out. Of course I am not trying to imply Amber is a horn dog or anything...

Vomit

I don't know about anyone else, but I find that I always feel like I am going to vomit when I have my last exam. When I was at UBC I went so far as to sit next to a garbage can. I hate this feeling, I wish it would pass.

Gizo

I found this link, which has the best coverage so far.

Garage Sale

I think I am going to try and arrange a massive garage sale in order to raise money for the Western Province of the Solomon Islands. Please let me know if you are intersted in helping or have any suggestions for locations

Gizo

By now most of you have probably heard about the earthquake and tsunami in the Solomon Islands. It happened near Gizo, a town that I spent 3 years living in. I don't know what to say...

The people I know...
Their families...
The places that are destroyed...


I just feel so frustratingly impotent.

Art n' stuff

After seeing this on the hour, I wanted to know more about the artist known as Banksy. So I found his website, check it out.

My Daze

Yesterday I arrived at UVIC campus at approx 7:15 am, I left at approx 9:35 pm. This morning I awoke at approx 5:25 am to get ready for Vanpool. At that point in time I was ready to shove my whole university/academic career down the toilet for another hours precious sleep. Thank god this term is nearly done.

Stardust

For those of you who don't know, I am a Neil Gaiman fan. And when I discovered that a movie was being made of stardust I went a little bit crazy happy.

Not sure about some of the casting, but willing to give benefit of the doubt.

Windswept and Interesting

My Mother, the great explorer, looking all fabulous and exotic, with bamboo stuff in background. This past week she climbed mount Sinai.

Quote of the Day

Too much of a good thing can be wonderful

-Mae West

Questions, Queries, etc.

I will do my toefl probably through U Vic on a bunch of weekends in July...maybe. I would have to figure out transportation. Anyone interested in taking that class with me, we could car pool? Only $954.00.

Right now the scenario that I am leaning towards is moving to Cairo for a year before going back to UBC. I think I'd like to spend a year or two abroad, maybe a year in Cairo, and a year in Korea. If anyone wants to come with I am open to destination changes, I just want to not be in Canada for sometime.

Once I finish the degree at UBC, I don't know what I will do, maybe some more time overseas, or maybe I will transfer to another university to study education.

I would really love to spend some more time in France. Maybe I will see about doing my education degree in Europe, or even more exciting...Halifax!

I think I had an epiphany the other day and it was a very simple one: I have to do what will make me happy, not what will please other people, or what society seems to dictate as appropriate. I won't ever be wealthy, I know that, but I want to be happy, and I think that is far more important. I can't worry about money, if I focused only on that I would never go anywhere or do anything.

Good Lord, I am turning into my Mother.

Quote of The Day

If you always do what you want to do at least one person is pleased.


-Katherine Hepburn

Possibilities

I have been spending a great deal of time thinking about what to do when I am done at
U VIC. Here are some of my choices:

1) Do my toefl certificate
2) Go to Korea teach English there
3) Go to Cairo live with Valerie and teach English there
4) Go to Vancouver finish my theatre degree
5) Apply for the journalism program*
6) Apply for the librarian studies program*
7) Apply for the education program at any one of a number of universities*


*The last three are pretty much contingent on finishing my UBC degree.

Quote of the Day

"Try everything once except incest and folk dancing."

- Thomas Beecham

Yar!

For all of you pirate fans out there.

Quotes of the Day

So a few quotes here for you from the one and only Douglas Adams.

"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."

"The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't."

"My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes."

"You live and learn. At any rate, you live."

Rollercoaster

I have a very good friend who is suffering. Not physically but I am sure the emotional tole is probably beginning to wear on him. I am talking about depression, and that horrible feeling of despair. The existential crisis that many 20 somethings seem to crash into. I have had my fair share of this, and sometimes I still find myself mired in that horrible sticky feeling. It is like emotional molasses, you feel trapped and don't want to move or go out or do anything.

At my worst I found myself seriously pondering a medicinal milkshake in order to end my pain. What prevented me from hurting myself was the thought of what it would do to the people I loved. For a time, they are what kept me going. About a year after that incident, my cousin was killed crossing the road on his way home from a bookstore, this threw me right back into depression land. I thought that being with my Family would help, but it was so draining trying to be strong, and trying to be there for all of them that I found myself tried in knots. There is only so much I could deal with, and because I had merely repressed my other issues, it all bubbled over until I was a complete wreck.

Pulling myself out of that pit was and is the hardest thing I have ever done. My psychiatrist worked with me on techniques for dealing, going for walks, avoiding escapism, writing a daily diary, practicing breathing techniques, and finding new ways of expressing myself. I forget who said it but there is a great quote "remember we are all in this together, alone." The only one who can solve my problems is me. I'm not saying that people can't help, I'm just saying that the essential choice to go on had to be mine. There is a great book by Anne Cameron called Tales of the Copper Woman, in which she has several short stories. One of the stories that had an impact on me was about this group of wise women. The women would listen to any problem brought before them, and then offer suggestions. They would do this twice, and then if the person with the problem returned and had not acted on the problem, they would turn their backs. I find thinking about that story helps me to avoid wallowing in whatever is getting me down. Happiness is something I have to work to achieve, and if I don't deal with my issues they will bite me in my ass. Also it isn't fair of me too continually lean on my friends for support, initially yes, but not indefinitely. As the cliche goes friendship is a two way street.


It is not easy to share these experiences, but I have posted this because I think that depression has some ugly stigmas attached and people still have a great deal of difficult discussing it. I don't want my friend to think that he is alone, and I hope he finds something that will make his struggle easier.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It has been a bit since my last post. Lots of stuff going on. Been to the doctor, have to go two more times...stupid sickness. They don't know what is wrong with me yet. Can't sleep, can't breathe, bit of a bother. School is almost done. Trip planning is in full swing. Turns out Valerie is coming home this summer, sometime in July I believe. She is still in Egypt, and I don't know if she likes it but she does enjoy the warmth. Anyway this is beginning to shape up like one of those horrid insincere Christmas letters, so thats enough of that.

Quote of the Day

The real fountain of youth is to have a dirty mind.

-Jerry Hall

Small Rant

Shut the fuck up!
Seriously!
This morning in my class there were these two girls who would not stop talking. I could barely hear the Proff over their insipid banter. Honestly who cares about your Cancun vacations. twats! I don't spend $485 a class to listen to that kind of crap.

Then I went to the computer lab to do some work on my essay. Same thing happened! I can understand if you are in the computer lab working together with someone else on a project, that is fine. But if you are in the lab gabbing away about some girl who supposedly hates you, and has a perfect life, fully expect someone (me) to be tempted to throw a computer at you.

While I am pretty sure I have some unresolved anger issues, I was not the only one vexed.

Quote of the day

I know he is a jerk and everything but that Prince Charming makes me hotter than July.
-Ugly Step-Sister
Shrek the Third

Genetic Experiments Have to Stop

Imagine if you will Sheep Gone Bad.

Anime

Check out this Paprika

Quote of the Day

People say to me, "You're not very feminine." Well they can suck my dick.

-Roseanne

Pussy for Peace!

These are awesome, had I more money I'd get a pair for all my girlfriends! We'd be just like our Greek homegirls in Lysistrata.

4 Little Girls

4 Little Girls
See this documentary. Spike Lee directed it, it is not a happy story but one that I think is important. There are some graphic images of corpses so be prepared for that. Also if keep your eyes open, you might get to see someone with my last name spewing out racist crap. That was something of a shocker, a possible distant (very distant) relative of mine taking a stand against civil rights. A proud, proud, proud moment for my family.

And my Mother wonders why I have always wanted to change my last name.